Daring to Hope

I've been extremely skeptical coming into this election year. For me, it has seemed far too much that change has been too far away. That so often, our allies were even the ones who placed barriers in front of our goals for change.

Particularly in the past few years, being disillusioned and cynical, I've been keeping my distance from the political process, from the activist world that I have generally otherwise maintained as a part of my identity. I have not had very much hope in the world.

Even seeing the progression of the campaigns, I've maintained a certain emotional distance, thinking that it might be more of the politics of the same, even with the players being different in some way.

And yet, as I watched the election results roll in, I couldn't help but be overwhelmed by emotion. Not only have we made a blip in history by electing the first black president of the United States, but we have seen a tremendous amount of change already. People came out to vote in record numbers today. People who have felt isolated from the political process, who have considered themselves to be outsiders to the decisions that have been made on the Hill, came out and voted in numbers that have not been seen before.

For years, I became jaded to the sense of apathy that I couldn't bear to witness amongst my peers, amongst the general public, amongst so many people that I've had contact with. And for once, I have to admit, ashamed though I may be about it, I began developing that hard shell of apathy even within myself.

The significance of what just happened today is more than just the fact that we have the first-ever black President. What happened today is far more significant than that. For the first time since I can remember, I feel as if the country is finally OURS again. That it is not a nation that is run by a few powerful families like the Bushes, it is not run by oil companies, the military-industrial complex, or any other industry. It is OURS.

I haven't felt this way in a very long time. The world seems possible again, in ways that I'd given up on since college. Just watching the speeches, I can recognize a connection to the process that I don't believe I've ever felt before. I feel like I can re-engage in the struggle, and dedicate myself 100% once more. That the work I've done before, and that the work I'll do in the future will MEAN something.

For the first time in a very long time, I am actually proud of my country again. I don't have to look at a flag and think that it is one of "their" tools. But I can look at it and say that it is a symbol of OUR country. That change is just as intrinsic to the symbol now as the hurt and war and bloodshed that I used to associate it with has been.

Today, I celebrate a new vision of America. I celebrate the fact that I live in a different country than I did before, because I live in a country that is so much more possible than the one I've been living in. I have hope for a new day. I have hope that tomorrow will truly be better than today.

I hadn't realized how far I'd sunk or how jaded I'd become until this moment. How much I'd allowed myself to be beaten down. Until now, when all doors are open again. Now that we live in a nation, a world, that has so much more possibility than it did before. That so many of us can step forward and work together toward a future that is so much brighter than I'd imagined it to be.

So from today, I am going to make several commitments. I commit to never allow myself to lose hope the way that I had again. I commit to re-engaging in the political process. I commit to making my life into a tool and instrument for positive change in the world again. I commit to looking into the future and seeing the possibilities inherent within it. But most of all, I commit to hope.